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I have long felt like I have more in common with my students than I do with my colleagues. It was true when I started teaching and it’s true even now, when my students look at me like I am as old as the hills (and about as relevant to their lives as the hills). It’s true even though I realize I am older than many of their parents. I still feel a kinship to them.
This despite the fact that I have no idea what they are talking about when they discuss “Real Housewives of Wherever” or the latest “I Think I Have Talent” reality show. This despite the fact that they go out at 10:00 and I go to bed at 9:00.
Students are here in college, creating and inventing themselves. They don’t always see it, but I do. Teaching 100 level courses, I see them come in as, well, raw material (doesn’t give you a flattering visual, does it?). By 400-level courses, they are a prototype, a roughed out product. When they come back to see me a year or two after graduation, they are Them version 1.0 (or sometimes 2.0). It’s a really cool process to see.
Some of my Them 3.0 students
I feel much the same. I get bored with myself and who I am. I try to tell myself that as long as I’m successful (whatever that means) and good at what I do, I should just keep on keeping on. But it’s never enough. It’s not that I’m aspiring to more money or a bigger car or house. I’m not even aspiring to change jobs. It’s more that I like the internal invention process. Or reinvention, in my case. I want to be Me version 8.3.2. I’m tired of Me 8.3.1. Or maybe I’m only Me 8.2 and I’ve got several steps to take before I’m Me 8.3.2. What version of You are you? How do you recreate/reinvent?
I relish being in a university environment where it seems anything is possible and there’s autonomy and opportunity to try different things, to be different. I’ve met some cool people along the way, in and out of school, who also inspire me to try different things. To be the best Me I can be. I just wonder if that’s a moving target and if I’ll ever hit it. Or will I be reinventing forever? And is that a bad thing if I am?
There’s a lot I can learn from my students. And I do, daily. Sometimes I have to tell them what to do. I wish someone would tell me what to do for a change.
Carpe reinvention.
