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Poaching a little on Martin Luther King’s words in the title there. It’s his day. I don’t think he’d mind. Even though I’m not talking about a dream nearly as vast and meaningful as his dream. My dream is…I want to write. I’m not sure what I want to write exactly. I just know I like to write. I enjoy writing. It’s something that’s all mine that I can do in solitude that makes me feel groovy. And thus, I want to do more of it.
Somebody out there is bound to be saying, “Hey, dummy, you are writing. I’m reading your blog.” And yes, a blog is a start. And I’ve written academic journal articles. And book chapters. And… Hey, I guess I have written. So let me revise my dream – I want to write what I want to write and I want it to be meaningful and helpful to someone else. Hmm, that’s a much better dream. Behold the power of writing.
I’m not going to say I aspire to be a great American novelist (but I’m not going to say I don’t, either). But the books (and they are books) I have in mind are mostly non-fiction. Not self-help, not humor, not DIY, not technical, but kind of hybrid multi-genre.
But every time I think about sitting down to write (and now I have a place to do so now – more about that in a moment), I get that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach similar to the feeling I get when my husband says, “Hey, let’s ride that roller coaster!” Or, “Come stand on this 25-story ledge with me.” (Ok, he’s never actually said the latter, but he might as well because that’s what I hear when I hear “roller coaster,” “zipline,” “rooftop,” or anything else higher than about 8 feet.)
My husband, knowing and supporting my dream as only a wonderful partner can, made me a space to write in. When I got home from a conference the other day, he surprised me with this:
After a weekend of shopping, it looks like this now:
It has a long way to go, but it’s a start. I’m just afraid. Terrified, really. I’m not sure of what–failure? Success? Ridicule? I guess that’s why I’m putting this out there. To take some of the power out of it. Because my inclination is to keep this dream a secret. And that could keep me in inaction. And I need to take action. I need to, as Patti Digh says, “Sit the hell down and write.” And she’s right.
Are you ready to carpe your dream? I will if you will.
